The Way of An Innernaut
The Way of An Innernaut
Innernaut Report 26
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-8:17

Innernaut Report 26

We Lie To Ourselves
woman in white crew neck shirt with red flower on her face
Photo by Jeff Hardi

The dreamer describes the difficulty of writing down his dream experiences. The inner into outer quality wants to come through; like trying to describe a movie, it loses a bit of the essence and understanding in the retelling. “What I am shown is that my discovery was lost in my ordinariness.”

Well, my partner’s dream had to be very tough on her. A repeating dream where you go over and over and over something and you can't break the trance that you are in. Well, in her case, she couldn't look in any direction without everything being abusive, "assaulted", as she called it. And that's exactly how everything is. We lie to ourselves for culpability purposes. We create some sort of streamlined approach to thinking, and tell ourselves that we're enjoying our life. We've got our act together in some capacity.

This is a-me-myself-and-I-approach. My best memory of this sort of thing was my childhood with wolf-dogs, fighting and building forts, windows being broken out of school; and having to run home to avoid getting beat up -- and enjoying it because that's what I was raised in. I had to make the best of it. Then when I joined the normal collective consciousness, I realized how far askew I was.

Now that I look at the collective consciousness for what it is, it's just a matter of degree. Everyone is still in a state of suffering and anguish. And the reason is because they have allowed themselves to get off into mind-sense orientation instead of adhering to who it is, and what it is, that they are.

I had a meditation dream that left me so keyed up and vivid in terms of this stuff that I couldn't go to sleep. and couldn't believe how clearly all of it came through. What was revealed inside of me is how much this inner into outer quality of oneself wants to come through. It's almost like it comes through with a playground being in the outer like a movie, but the movie almost has a predestined quality to it as well as you can come to see and know things. There's a pre-destiny to it as if you are writing the script.

This is my dream. I'll go through it. The recognition of how something is to unfold as step-by-step process is shown to me in a review from within. I wasn't going to write this, because I saw it so clearly: it was obvious. It was already written up inside of myself and yet when I opened my eyes, this step by step which is impossible to not know, the unforgettable certainty fades, and I hadn't written any of it down. What I am shown is, that my discovery was lost in my ordinariness.

And what I saw as a process, all laid out step by step from the beginning, describes a predesign. As a chronology, it’s there for all to see. I mean, to me, it's obvious. Why is it that people just don't see this?

This occurred when the veils were lifted so that all was fully known. So what is going on? I am going over a step-by-step portrayal of what is revealable as a memory. The way this is happening is you can see it, as if it is something going on in the outer, or the normal mind sense, much like you can create and design a movie.

We are living in a movie. I'm seeing this inside of myself. That's the immensity of myself in terms of being an intertwining and permeating essence. I can flicker these movies. I just know what’s to be. It's a depth within to a remembrance, a vivid remembrance of what is obvious, but it fades away. When you come back to the mind senses, it’s all I can do to remember the obvious.

So the deeper meaning of what was going on is that what I am doing is becoming more clear and succinct. The scenario laid out is like a brief, as if pre-written for the courts. It's just a matter of me saying, "Oh, I've got it." It tells a story succinctly without leaving anything to question. It's just black and white obvious, it had been somehow missing the obvious as intended. I got up and had to do this, and realized that whatever I had done before had been missing the obvious which was intended. I wasn't bringing it from inner into the outer properly which has a clarity as it comes through.

Yes. It's still an illusion. It's still a movie in the outer, but you break right through the collective consciousness. It's as if the meditation had tuned this in ethereally. What I read was clear to me when I wrote it within. When I came out of the meditation, it was clear to me, I had written it up again, still not as straightforward and readily apparent as I had thought, which means it was fading. So by going over within a readily apparent awareness for all to see clearly is reviewed coming through me free of the usual mindsense bewilderment standing in the way of a ready comprehension.

So you take out the mind-senses and you have the self intertwined, then that intertwined something is permeating through all that there is. There is nothing but nothingness, just this permeation. However it is that flickered. These moving pictures become something that is set and designed. That is your storyline! Not this other minutiae which you’re seeing and hearing in such a dumbed down capacity that you just bounce all over the place.

My meditated journey permeates from inner into outer like a storyline, going from complex to simple, and from complex to subtle to a readily apparent memory with nothing left to figure out. It's kind of like a materialistic approach in a way, where you're using visions that have a tiny bit of a fabricated substance --like a movie and you write the script. In fact, maybe that's what a dream is. You're doing all of this stuff as if through a beam of light.

I'm doing it in another way. So what I saw permeating as a knowingness functioning without any outer substance yet it's imaged as if this is so. I dream something and tell the story of something that you could relate to, as if could have happened in the outer. You know, there's a story there, but it didn't happen. It's a revealed concept portrayed as an aliveness, a material physical aliveness.

As an even higher recognition of things what I'm talking about is what everyone is aware of having come from. They have come from an inner to a denser outer permeating through all there is into a design manifestation; hopefully you are able to take it to the revelational, and not just yo-yo back and forth.

Thanks for reading! This post is public so feel free to share it.

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